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Writer's pictureAddison

Self Care Tools: Deprogramming Behaviors

Emotions are not the enemy, like pain they are the teacher. Ignorance of where they are coming from and why we are experiencing them is fertilizer for the spinning fans of our world.


Here's a tool for anyone recognizing their own reactions of fear, anger, and/or guilt: a silent rejection.


  1. At that moment when you become aware of the undesired feeling, inwardly say "No." I do it three times for added emphasis, "No, no, no."

  2. Visualize the "worst case scenario," and visualize yourself accepting and adapting to it.

    1. Visualize yourself thriving in spite of the "worst case scenario." You're creating the emotional environment to overcome your worst nightmares!

  3. Finally, I add a replacement intention or thought regarding the specific behavior: "failure is necessary for growth." Do it three time if you have the patience. I find that stating my replacement thought as a request for help to be very effective, but you are free to experiment: "may I overcome my fear of failure," or just "God help me," if you want a classic.

Sometimes the effect is immediate, but be prepared to give it a few days to take root once you've planted the seed.


For a behavior, rather than a feeling, it's the same process- except for step 2: visualize yourself in the optimal scenario, and feel yourself accepting and adapting to manifest that circumstance.


Now the most important part of the process is to give yourself replacement thoughts or behaviors. You cannot simply remove the old without providing the new. For every action, there must be an equal and opposite reaction!


Objections and concerns:

You might be thinking, "why would I imagine myself in the worst case scenario? The law of attraction states that if I keep doing that I'll actually wake up in school in just my underwear!" First of all, nobody's perfect: why are you going to school in the first place! If you go out half naked, get some sun! Just because you visualize yourself being "okay" with a "worst case scenario," it does not mean you are inviting this circumstance into your life. You are simply preparing yourself to be composed IF the situation arises. When life throws disaster at you, do you want to meet it with all your wits, or do you want to be completely shocked into a mental and emotional meltdown?

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